Nothing changed

Transform me
Whip me up into another
from where I can be whole
Or as whole as it is allowed to be.
There needs to be a violence to it, I wont go quietly.
Scrape my face and finger-grime my hair
At least I’ll know at last that something’s there.
Prise my heavy ribs off my clutched heart
And let it breathe, swim.
Rip out my sagged lungs and rinse them out,
Let me be new.
Wring out the mottled arteries veering off my heart.
A fresh stream flows there now.
Clear and ruby.
Tear up the rotted carpet of the city
And let the beetles loose.
They glisten and listen,
Can’t you hear the walls shatter
In the house that never mattered
To anyone
worth mattering about?
With my clenched fist
I enlist the rats to join me in tearing it all down.
They’re only too delighted
Rats are clever
And tired of being slighted.
I want to burn it all
Whirl it all into a blow-away dust
And laugh and dance and come home and find that
Nothing has changed.